Points of You (The Coaching Game) - Purposeful Pause

Written on the 3 May 2013 by Points of You & Talent Tools

Time Requirement:  10 minutes maximum

Framework:   Suitable for independent, individual and group work

Background

Pausing isn't easy. In everyday life, we constantly rush to fulfill all our roles, yet there's one role we tend to
neglect – being me, getting together with myself.  Pausing is an excellent opportunity to get acquainted with
ourselves and in addition – every process of internal work begins by making the choice to pause, conduct an
intimate meeting with ourselves and take the opportunity to introspect. Whether we like it or not, life
sometimes forces us to take a pause: the death of a relative, illness, a farewell, economic crisis or a change
in the family. However, we can make a conscious choice to pause, breathe and ask – how am I doing?

Using the cards as a focus.  the pausing process allows us to peel off our external layers, listen and take a look
at ourselves, away from the automatic patterns that compose our daily routine.

Objectives

We highly recommend beginning individual meetings, group gatherings and personal meetings with ourselves –
with a pausing process. Pausing significantly contributes to efficient and profound work as the meeting progresses.
The process creates focus and concentration and substantially neutralises background noises that surround us
every day. Beginning the meeting with a pause process also helps us to optimally exhaust the coaching/therapeutic
potential embodied in the cards.

Furthermore, most of us don’t have any time for ourselves between home and work, children and our personal
relationship, television and sleeping, night and a new day. Pausing allows us to take a breath and create some in-
between time in our clip-like life on the fast lane.       

The process

1. Since the purpose of the process is a physical and mental pause, we suggest that participants find a spot for
    themselves in the room and situate themselves in the position they find most comfortable: sitting up straight,
    leaning on the wall, lying down or whatever they feel is comfortable.

2. In order to limit the time frame for the process, we recommend playing a musical piece of 10 minutes maximum,
    which we consider to be neither too short nor too long and just enough to create a pause in our daily lives.
    We choose musical pieces that on the one hand contain calming rhythms and on the other include more
    vibrant rhythms. This combination helps participants connect to the pausing process from a surprising and
    unobvious place.

3. While playing the musical piece, participants are asked to close their eyes and simply let go.
    We also instruct participants to take note of the following three questions:
     - What do I physically feel during the process? tiredness, restlessness, muscle strain etc.
     - How do I feel? Do I feel good? Not too bad, but not great? A varying range of feelings?
     - What am I thinking about? What's bothering or troubling me? What thought remain inside
       my head and won't let go? Which thought reoccurs?
    We call this point the "thoughts' hunter", meaning focusing on  physical aspects, feelings and thoughts that come
    up during the  process. This is an important tool for creating clarity and  focusing on meaningful topics that bother
    participants. Therefore, it is an important starting point for the work to be  conducted later along the meeting.

4. After the musical piece ends, each participant slowly and calmly returns to his seat.

Ending the process

At the end of the process, it is important to emphasise the qualities included in pausing, since pausing is a tool on
its own and cleverly using it, allows us to take a moment away from our daily routines, thereby presenting the
option of true change.

Other Games with Points of You

Power of the Word: How to Look at a Coaching Card

Learn more about The Coaching Game

Instructions and examples